Skip to main content

My Eating Disorder

My battle with food is a battle I will fight for the rest of my life. I know this. I hate this. But I can win at this.

I traded one eating disorder for another it seems. I went from overeating and eating my feelings, to obsessing over calories. MyFitnessPal helped me to lose weight. But I realize just how much calorie counting has consumed my life. So I am deleting MFP. I refuse to fall victim to a life of calorie obsessing.  These questions have plagued me daily for several years now:

What my intake should be?
How much did I burn?
Does it fit my macros?
Should I eat back my burned calories?
What is the calories in this bite?
Will I have enough for a small dessert?
Will this blow my daily sugar/salt/fat?

It is an endless bombardment of obsession over calories! I am done!
I don't want food to run the rest of my life. I want to enjoy food without fear. But also respect my body to only give it what it needs, with the occasional treat on the side.

I have decided I am going to follow the food pyramid. Keep track of my servings not the calories. Make sure that I get my 2 cups of health dairy and my daily dose of healthy fats. Cut out as much refined sugar and starch as possible without completely denying myself anything.  Have a half a plate of veggies,  and  a quarter lean protein and a quarter starch. 
I have been at this for two days now. It's hard. I still flip every package over and look at the calorie content.  I know it will take time.

But I know this will be good for me.

Labels:

Comments

  1. Margaretta CloutierJanuary 17, 2016 at 7:46 PM

    It takes a lot of courage to post something like this and I want to commend you for your time and effort. I know a lot of younger women who would benefit from reading this as well so I will be sure to pass it along. Food shouldn't be something that should cause as much strife as it does. I am glad to hear that you are enjoying food again.

    Margaretta Cloutier @ Aspire Wellness Center

    ReplyDelete
  2. Liz: The Working MomJanuary 19, 2016 at 12:50 PM

    Thanks Margaretta! It is a daily fight, but so far I am down 24 pounds, and winning...without the obsession!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Chobani, Bondi Bands, Allergies ...Oh My!

So recently I have had the amazing privilege and joy of trying out a couple of awesome products. I cannot wait to share either! GIVEAWAY TIME! I received a case of Chobani Flips to review...and as we all know yogurt is a staple in most healthy diets...especially mine. I have been a Chobani nut for over a year now. It is one of my favorite and most filling snacks, not to mention the protein ! It is a quick and easy breakfast if needed, or an awesome post-workout snack. And now that it is summertime it is super refreshing on a hot summer day! There were so many yummy types to try...and I could not wait to dig in! There were two of each, so 12 in total! They are fair in calories, low in sugar, and taste great. The day I got the case I did a little jig, and then hunted down a spoon. The first flip I sampled was the Almond Coco Loco ...                           IT WAS DIVINE!!!...and my favorite! Se...
22 comments
Read more

You Don't Know What Loss Is

***Disclaimer- There is some not so friendly language and thoughts here. FYI. I have one to share today that has been rattling around in my over productive brain for a few weeks now, basically since we attended Nora's bond hearing back in March. We thought we were prepared for that day, and once again, we were proven wrong. I keep waiting for this to get easier, as people love to remind us. I keep waiting for time to heal us, when time just keeps passing us by... I thought that the hardest thing about that day was having to look at the woman that is accused of murdering my nephew . To see the actual hands that threw his little body across the room moments before his life ended. To see the hands of the monster that could have sat him in a play pen, and dialed any one of our telephone numbers, but instead tossed John to his death. But those hands were cuffed, and as much comfort as I could get from that, I was disgusted by another sight. The sight of the woman sitting behind ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Little Heart Broke Apart

I broke my bracelet tonight, and sat in my front yard and cried as I looked relentlessly for all the little, tiny pieces. That little blue beaded bracelet broke my heart when it broke and flew across the yard. That little blue bracelet brought on a wave of heartache that I have buttoned up for the past couple of months. We continue to put on our brave faces. Tell everyone that we are doing okay, that we are getting by. And in all reality we are.  The world continues to spin.  Life continues to move us right along. After what seemed to be an unusually rough week, this just defeated me emotionally. When that bracelet broke I was painfully reminded of why I wear it everyday. Angela made that little blue bracelet for me shortly after John was killed. She made each of us one. It's made of beads that are layered to resemble angels. For our little angel. This happened at ten in the evening in the darkest part of the yard. As I was frantically searching the grass ...
Post a Comment
Read more